Author’s Introduction

Would you rather eat chocolate than meditate? Me too. In this book, you will learn how to do both at the same time while transforming your life using well-established principles for living more fully. The fundamentals to cultivating an unshakable sense of inner joy have been known for centuries—2,600 years to be exact. With stunningly precise parallels, both ancient wisdom and modern science identify the same key elements to joyful living. The problem with getting this message out seems to be poor marketing. Neither the ancients nor scientific researchers have done a great job of making the road attractive or accessible to the average person in the twenty-first century. To further confuse matters, most of what the popular media and common sense teach about happiness is incorrect, sending us in the wrong direction from the start.

After twenty-five years of helping thousands of people lead more fulfilling lives, I found two ingredients that made this knowledge palatable to almost everyone regardless of life situation, education, cultural background, or income level: chocolate and humor. The former entices you start the journey, and the latter makes it entertaining enough to keep you moving forward. After all, the pursuit of happiness should be fun.

As a practitioner, professor, and researcher of psychotherapy, I have carefully studied what leads to happiness and how people change for decades. I have continuously sought to discern what helps people find and sustain the happiness they seek. The answers are surprisingly consistent and clear. In this book, I will share with you my discoveries.

First, I will debunk popular myths that have us looking for happiness in all the wrong places (chapter 2), and then I will construct an accurate map for getting where we want to go (hint: it’s not a treasure map; chapter 3). Next, you will learn the hardest but ultimately most liberating lesson: making friends with life and all that is, including the good, the bad, and the ugly—which includes black widow spiders for some of us (chapter 4). From there, you will learn surprisingly playful and palatable options for maximizing your joy, including mindfulness, crazy wisdom, compassion, and ethical living (chapters 5–8). If you have avoided meditation and similar practices for most of your life because they are dull and boring, you may find something that suits your refined and zesty taste for living here. Finally, I teach you how to avoid—or at least survive—the common pitfalls and the dangerous snakes that line the path from where you are to where you want to go (chapter 9). Along the way, I promise numerous opportunities to laugh, to cry, and to reconnect with the best within yourself. You will suddenly discover your most desperate challenges dissolving before you, revealing an easier path and renewing your delight in living and loving. Worst-case scenario: you will have educational excuses to savor some chocolate delights, enjoy a few good laughs, and gain a handful of new insights about your life.

Whether you are reeling from a devastating breakup; feeling adrift professionally; struggling with depression, anxiety, or more severe mental health issues; or simply wanting to feel happier given the numerous blessings in your life, this book will help you make changes that you could never accomplish before because you will now be motivated to do something different. I assure you that you won’t have to do much: small, tiny steps—with frequent chocolate rewards.

Ultimately, this book invites you to play. To laugh. To love. To heal old heartbreaks. To overcome what was once impossible. To open your heart to life and all it has to offer: white, milk, and dark. The stresses of modern life often create the illusion that life is hard, painful, and lonely. You are only a few bites away from an entirely different approach to living a sweeter life. There is nothing but a wrapper and that nagging inner naysayer stopping you from beginning the journey right now! Although you may find a tempting excuse or two, there is no reason to linger. An easier, more joyful life is effortlessly within reach. Thank you for daring to share the adventure with me.

Your companion on the journey of a lifetime,

Diane R. Gehart, PhD

Westlake Village (LA-ish), California

Table of Contents

Author’s Introduction